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Bassist wanted for a hard hitting London pro covers band
The purpose of having this page is to give full details of how hard the job is and what I will demand from you. I am not trying to lure anyone into becoming a member, because I know damn well that it will take someone very “special” to want to play with this band under the conditions that we operate. I would not like just anyone to give it a try too and then decide that “it is not for me”. With this page I am exclusively trying to attract the very decisive and dedicated people that will have the stomach and the nerves for this job and know exactly what they want to do and whom to play with.
The first thing that I have to make abundantly clear is that I am not looking for people that are going to bring me headaches. I am looking for very down to earth people that have the very important ability of cooperating. Working for a covers band is not glamorous and it definitely is not a well paid job (and it can’t be because the pub scene is doing really badly -and now due to the smoking ban things are already becoming even worst- and less and less pubs are booking live entertainment), so if you think that you are “the best gun in town but somehow people don’t realize” and that you “deserve so much more than you are getting offered”, please don’t bother reading. In life, especially since we live in open market economies, everyone gets exactly what they are worth of and they have to work really hard to be able to get what they end up getting. Being in a band is a tricky business. Being in a band that will pay you (even if it is a pittance) is even trickier, so if you don’t have the stomach or the nerves just stop reading. Playing the pub circuit is tough and it’s getting worse and worse by each passing week.
The max I can afford to pay anyone for any gigs (no matter how good they are, or how well they were doing in the past) is 50 pounds (£50). This means that if we play for free (no fee for the band) at one of my friend’s social functions or a charity gig, you get £50, if we play for a fee of £100, you get £50, if we play for a fee of £200, you get £50, etc. etc. This is how this works and we will never discuss this issue again, simply because this job doesn't pay as well as many people think. I certainly can't afford to give more. It’s a take it or leave it offer. You either take the offer or you leave the offer. It’s your decision to make. If it’s not enough, don’t join in the first place.
Having spoken about the money issue, keep in mind that I am doing lots of donkey work by arranging all the gigs (that along takes many hours each working day), providing all the equipment for the gigs (P.A, lights, etc. Not an amp and BASS guitar; that’s the responsibility of the bassist to provide), loading and unloading –usually on my own- the van with all the heavy equipment etc., ...in general absolutely everything related to the band. What is also important to keep in mind, is that I have already spent 5 years of my life to put the band together, play gigs, buy / repair the band’s equipment, buy a van and insurance, M.o.T, road tax, etc. for it. I guess that it is fair to say that lots of very heavy investment has already gone into this band, so you can easily imagine that we are looking for someone that is going to be very serious about the prospect of performing with this band without only thinking about the £50. A musician that has a good stage presence and can communicate well with the band members and the crowd. To be able to do that, you need to know the songs by heart and play them with confidence. If you are not willing to do lots of homework, then you will never play really well and you will never be able to put a proper performance and communicate with the crowds. (You won’t be allowed to use any charts / papers with notes during the gigs. We are a rock band not a church choir). If you can only play music but refuse to perform and you think that you will join in and then look at your shoes during the gigs, please don’t bother getting in touch. If and when you audition, you will be asked to move around or / and headbang. So if you can’t do that, you fail the audition straight away.
Still reading? Good ;-)
We are looking to finalize the line up as a trio a.s.a.p. We need to find the right person and keep gigging (CURRENTLY WE PLAY ABOUT 7 to 9 GIGS A MONTH BUT WE ARE LOOKING TO INCREASE THE NUMBER), instead of having to cancel gigs. The band usually consists of a singing drummer (myself) and one (singing) guitarist plus one bassist. I don’t intent to play in any other type of formation. There won't be more that 3 people on stage at any given time.
I would describe my band as a lively, intense, humorous professional (I am officially self employed registered with the Inland Revenue) covers band with a HEAVY m3taL / PUNK ROCK sound and very good presentation. The songs that we do, we change to very powerful, mostly fast and loud Rock, because most of those songs have nothing to do with Rock originally. If you don’t love bands that sound like Motorhead, AC/DC or the Ramones, don’t even bother reading any further, you’ll be wasting your time. We need people that love this type of music and want to play as loud and fast as that and crucially, look like they enjoy themselves when they play. We will NOT have anyone joining the band if we can’t make sure that we will have a good time during the rehearsals (we intend to do just 1 or 2 rehearsals because we know the songs very well already) and when we play live. I had a few sleepy idiots in the past and I’ve learned my lessons the hard way; so I will have a zero tolerance when it comes to matters like that. We need real rockers, no mama’s boys / girls; someone that can move around and put a proper show on. If you can’t do that, stop reading, we will DEFINITELY NOT EMPLOY you. A great musician is not as important as an entertaining musician and in this job you have to look and act the part. If you can't do that, I can't find any reason why you should be getting paid to look bored. In a 3 piece formation the two front people need to look excited and they need to be entertaining.
We have 45 songs (100% ready and already performed live for the last 4 years). Pubs / bars are asking for a minimum of a 2 hour set, but in many occasions we end up playing for 3 hours because people simply can’t get enough and of course we are only too happy to oblige. (Even the most talented people need to work very hard to learn all these songs).
Here is a part of our set list but do keep in mind that we actually change the songs to much faster and heavier versions: Hello, Anarchy in the UK, Ain't No Sunshine, Wonderful World, I'll be there for you, You Spin Me Around, Don't you want me, Nothing Compares To You, I don't want to grow up, You're the one that I want, Natural Woman, 99 Red Balloons, Basket Case, Down Under, It's Not Unusual, Tainted Love, Time After Time, We are the world, You got it, Just Like Heaven, Eternal Flame, Love me do, Stand By me, Take on me.
One interesting thing about us musically, is that we have tones of vocal harmonies. We absolutely overload all our songs with vocal harmonies and that’s why a singing guitarist will be preferred to a non singing one.
What I am trying to achieve, is to establish the band enough, so that we can play gigs not just in pubs or bars, but in proper venues too; not only in the London area, but also in the rest of the UK and maybe abroad. (Thankfully we have the pro looking set: lots of sound activated lights, a drum riser, a projection screen etc. So a long term planning is already in place). What we need to do, is find a musician that will like the band enough to want travel -to and from rehearsals and gigs- and play with passion and interact with the crowd. A musician that will commit to playing with the band for a minimum of one year; joining the band and then only playing 3 or 4 gigs is definitely NOT what I am looking for as this will result to lots of cancelled gigs and waste of time in trying to find a new player.
You will be required to dedicate quite a lot of time, so I am not looking to work with people that are already playing for another 5 bands or / and don't have lots of available time. (Personally I exclusive play with this band and so does my guitarist). I definitely don’t want any people that will look at this as “just a covers band”. I’ve seen successful cover bands playing venues like the Shepherds Bush Empire, so I know that with lots of work and a bit of luck everything is possible. You need to be hard working and committed, so that you can learn 45 songs and perform up to 180 minute gigs (most of the time without any breaks whatsoever). And before you think this is too much, let me tell you that if I can play drums (double pedal), sing on the top and then talk to the crowd, then you certainly can do it too!!!
Samples of your playing will definitely be required - a fresh live recording on a cheap walkman or a live recording from your previous band will do- so you must be able to supply a demo (place it on the internet, or e-mail it / post to me). People that can’t / won’t provide samples simply don’t interest me at all and I will immediately stop all negotiations, until they decide to provide a demo. I can’t guess someone’s ability, I need to hear it and see it.
Now, unless I have heard samples of your music or I have seen you play live already, I need to know a few things about you. If you decide to apply for the vacancy, please give detailed answers to the following questions. (Please be as specific as possible. If you give stupid answers like “I like all sorts of music” and “I have my own gear” you will be ignored. If you can’t be bothered to answer properly, I will not bother to answer back at all. Remember that this is a professional band, not a part time little garage band. All answers have to be honest. My bullshit detector is working over time already, so don’t even try to tell any lies).
1) Location / Based in:
2) Age:
3) Music styles that you enjoy playing:
4) Experience (gigs, recordings etc.):
5) In any other bands (part time or fully time)?:
6) Do you work full time / part time, are you unemployed?:
7) Gear: .......... (if you don't have an amp or a guitar, apply when you have both)
8) Transport?: (it will be YOUR RESPONSIBILITY to travel to join the 2 band members or directly to the gigs. IF there is going to be a need for me to help out in the direction of helping moving you and your gear around, I will have to deduct money from your payment to cover for my time and the petrol)
9) Any links to hear / see you (please provide URL):
10) Will you e-mail mp3s or jpgs (yes, I need to see how you look too) or post CD-R or tape?
Apart from the harsh things mentioned here (reality is harsh too though, so I need to write those things) note that we have a good thing going, people love the band AND we have a good vibe within the band with myself and the guitarist being a very good “team”.
Thanks.
George info@yperano.com
www.myspace/coverups
Current mailing address: George, P.O.Box 17222, W12 8ZG, London.
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